(no subject)

[seekingferret]

I don't know what to say this morning. Yesterday there was a community Shabbaton. I was in a bubble of friendship and community and happiness and no contact with the outside world and then I emerged from it last night to the first post up on facebook being one of my friends in Pittsburgh assuring everyone that he and his wife were still alive. Popped the bubble. Popped a lot of bubbles for a lot of people.


I want to thank the people who, very sweetly, reached out to me last night or this morning to check in on me. I don't have words to say what it means to me to feel that I have people who care about me.


Mostly, I am just trying to keep going. I have watched "Might Lead To Mixed Dancing" several times this morning, and it has been a comfort. If it would be of comfort to you, I'll save you the effort of having to click for it:

"Warning: Might Lead to Mixed Dancing" (Watch on YouTube)

I am baking challah this morning. It feels like the only right response to this attack is to perform a mitzvah. To perform as many mitzvot as possible. To accept the gift.

To be a Jew in the twentieth century
Is to be offered a gift. If you refuse,
Wishing to be invisible, you choose
Death of the spirit, the stone insanity.
Accepting, take full life. Full agonies:
Your evening deep in labyrinthine blood
Of those who resist, fail, and resist; and God
Reduced to a hostage among hostages.

The gift is torment. Not alone the still
Torture, isolation; or torture of the flesh.
That may come also. But the accepting wish,
The whole and fertile spirit as guarantee
For every human freedom, suffering to be free,
Daring to live for the impossible.

~Muriel Rukeyser

Comments

[grrlpup]

<3 Thank you for posting and for including the vid. <3

[seekingferret]

<3

[ambyr]

Yesterday afternoon, I was watching the HD broadcast of the Met opera, and I thought, wouldn’t it be funny if I spotted seekingferret in the audience? And then I realized of course I wouldn’t, because you’d never go to a matinee on Shabbat, which was very closely followed by the realization that many, many Jews would not see the news I was already struggling to process until that evening, that the trauma of discovery was going to spread like a wave with sundown. And I don’t know why that made things feel even more awful, but it did.

My heart goes out to everyone.

[seekingferret]

Yeah, it makes sense that it would make it worse.

<3

[gwyn]

Thank you for posting, and especially the light of the vid.

[seekingferret]

:)

[alexseanchai]

♥

[morbane]

I'm glad you're here.

Thanks for the vid re-link.

[seekingferret]

<3

[ghost_lingering]

<3<3<3

[seekingferret]

<3

[cahn]

<3 I wish I knew something, anything to say. I'm glad you have your community of faith <333

[seekingferret]

<3

[elipie]

<3

[seekingferret]

<3

[brainwane]

I continue to think of you. I thought you might want to know that I mentioned you in my blog post about the shooting. I wish you safety and I wish you joy.

[ride_4ever]

It feels like the only right response to this attack is to perform a mitzvah. To perform as many mitzvot as possible. Yes.

Also, I have watched this vid of yours many times, starting with when I first saw it being shown at VVC. It always brings joy.